Most people take an avoidant approach to the topic of death. Of course, it is uncomfortable to think that our existence will come to an end. Those that choose to think about it may encounter the following thoughts:

1. Who will remember me?
2. Will my life have mattered?
3. What if I have accomplished nothing?
4. Will my loved ones move on?
5. Will my loved ones move on too quickly?
6. What will there be after death?
7. Will it be painful to die?
8. What will ceasing to exist be like?
   

Many who struggle with the fear of death rely on spirituality for answers. Spirituality and religion generally offer a framework in which death is the gateway to something beyond our life on earth.

Instead of wrestling with the most common ideas of what lies beyond death, we propose a belief that is compatible with all other beliefs:

The way in which you die may be painful, but being dead, in and of itself, cannot be experienced.

If there is an afterlife –> your death will be the key to discovering a heaven or hell. The time after your death, in your own “old” consciousness, will not be experienced in a way that is to be feared. You will have a new consciousness, that is, in all likelihood, much better.

If there is no afterlife -> you will never experience being dead, and all the worries associated with death will vanish with your life. The time after your death, in your own consciousness, will not be experienced in a way that is to be feared. You will have no consciousness. You will simply be dead.

In either case— whether there’s an afterlife or not— being dead won’t be something you experience.

Being dead does not need to be feared, because it will not be experienced.

A CONVERSATION BETWEEN TWO HIGHLY INTELLIGENT PEOPLE:

“Do you struggle with the fear of death?”

NO

“Why?”

I AM IMMORTAL

“What?! no you’re not”

YES, I AM

“I will literally kill you right now”

YOU CANNOT, BECAUSE I AM IMMORTAL

“So, if I shoot you right now, you won’t die?”

IF I DIE, I WON’T BE ABLE TO THINK, SO I WILL NEVER KNOW THAT I AM NOT IMMORTAL

“You know that you’re going to die eventually, right?

PROOF?

“You are an idiot”

NO, I AM IMMORTAL

Unfortunately, the immortal person in the excerpt above later died when he explained his philosophy to an oncoming train.

Statistically speaking, it is unlikely that any of us is immortal, but just like a real immortal person, we don’t have to torture ourselves with the fear of being dead. The only problem that remains is how to deal with the worries associated with death while we are still alive.

Like most things, the path to peace is focusing on what you can control and learning how to move away from worrying about what you cannot control.

1. Who will remember me?
2. Will my life have mattered?
3. What if I have accomplished nothing?
4. Will my loved ones move on?
5. Will my loved ones move on too quickly?
6. What will there be after death?
7. Will it be painful to die?
8. What will ceasing to exist be like?
   
9. How can I make the life that I am living now as meaningful and enjoyable as possible?

Instead of worrying about death and the fears associated with death, we can choose to gently aim our attention towards living a fulfilling life while we are still here.

Life is a temporal, fleeting experience by nature. Within this brief span, lies potential for meaning- for deep connections- for a totally fulfilling existence. Instead of dwelling on an unknowable future, devote your energy to the possibilities of the present.

The best way to do this, and to stay committed to it moment-by-moment, is to develop a personal mission, a commitment to your highest values in the form of your own manifesto.

Developing a personal mission keeps you aligned with your highest values, instead of living a life of being lost in the weeds of the unfortunate realities of life- like death.

Contact us for help developing your personal mission statement:
CONSOLATIONSPROJECT@GMAIL.COM